It's been almost more than a year and a half since my last blog post.

A little birdie told me that they were waiting for me to post something new.
I'm curious as to who this person could be, how did they find this little empty space. This little pebble in a sea of stones.


I picked up blogging as a young adult in middle school. In many ways I had little to no inhibitions in writing. Unashamed and blindly egotistical, I wrote as much as I wanted. Sloppy and embarrassing at best, I ranted over anything I wanted. It didn't have to have a point other than the fact that I was angry over something or at the very least something that bothered me. My friends enjoyed my blogging if they liked me in real life, otherwise they were probably bored of my blogs.

Truth be told, I wrote my last entry full of anger and frustration. Nobody wants to see that- Correction, everybody wants to see the turmoil. I created this blog as a window for a caring person to peer into my soul. I wanted to make both my feelings open and easy to get, yet hidden away, enough so that not just anyone could see it. I wanted to reward someone who could last 15 minutes for me with a goldmine of information to the inner workings of my soul. I wanted to feel special.

I've found somewhat of a calmer mind nowadays. I am no longer the timid boy with a fiery heart. An angry bird with no guts to fight anything bigger than itself. I like to see myself as a lazy lion. I am a lot more chill nowadays. I have a lot more self confidence now than I had a year ago.

Here's a little secret. In a bittersweet way, there is someone I'd really like to be following me, a certain special someone. It'd be a bittersweet thing though, I'm not exactly impressed with my old entries. Do you know I'm chronically unimpressed by entries created by my past self?


A certain special someone. Even now, as I inch closer to girls, any girl that manages to help fill the void, I can't help but think about you. I've never asked you out, do you know why? I don't really know. I've fished around for dozens and dozens of excuses. A lot of them are really good too. This may be an over exaggeration, but the if you're crazy about someone like I am, I doubt any reason is good enough. You just... want to do something stupid.

I want to do something stupid. But I can't, does that mean I love you less? cause I can't bring myself to do it? Or could it mean I love you more, that I'm willing to sacrifice a little blind stupidity.


For little Mr or Mrs Birdie. Where did you find my blog? I'm very curious. I don't write blogs that much anymore. And I write them sporadically in my irl journal, xanga and a plethora of other places. I wasn't kidding when I said I was trying to resist being a temptation whore.
I skype, facebook and pretty much every medium known to the standard interwebber (I don't twit, that shit's dank). w h o i s e a r l (with no spaces) is my skype user. ;3

Comment back little birdie <3